Heart Rate Found but Team Fitness MIA

I was chatting to a friend about my new venture in the gym when she said that she can't use the cross trainer as it makes her heart rate sky-rocket and then the machine cuts out!  I was most curious to know how the machine knew what her heart rate was.  Ahem! She tells me very patiently that those silver things on the handles are actually electrodes that pick up your heart rate!  Oooooh!!!  Ok, so with this new info I headed back to the other side of the N2.  Yes, I see the silver jobs.  Ok, but today I want to do weights, so I just need a quick warm up and then move onto building some muscle.  I warm up on my old favourite - the rowing machine.  I then go to the circuit.  Oops, I can't seem to find the machines I need and having been instructed at the posh gym, I was unfamiliar with the layout in this gym.  No problem - I will just find one of those Virgins with the red t-shirt that says "fitness team" on the back.  Oh, none to be found.  No worries, I am paying a small fortune to belong to this gym franchise, so there must be someone available to assist me.  Off I go down to reception where they ask me if there is no one on the floor that I can find.  Ummm, yes, sure there is, but I just felt like coming downstairs and asking if there was anyone available to screw everyone around.  No, there is no one, unless you want me to go in and ask the oke giving the spinning class or the girlie doing to the stretch and tone class.  So the receptionist pages the fitness team asking one to please report to reception.  No one arrives.  She looks at me and says there is no one available.  Oi, this is not good.  I tell her not to worry, I will do cardio AGAIN today.  I march back upstairs and hop on a cycle.  Ah yes, I find those electrode thingies, and wragtig it picks up my heart rate!  So I pedal myself to a point of profuse sweating and a wildly beating heart.  This is cool - I guess the power of endorphins is not to be underestimated!  I do another stint on the rower and then call it a day.  I feel quite cheated as I really wanted to do weights, but I figure this is a long term process, and there is not much point in overdoing it and perhaps injuring myself or something.  You know at my age, one needs to be careful!

I leave the gym unimpressed.